I used to be fun
What I've realized over the weekend is how much I've changed over the course of the year. Everyone always makes note of how these are the fast changing times of our life, that these are the times where we look back only a short while later and realize "man was I ever stupid back then." That's supposed to be a good thing; It means that you've matured a little bit, that you're smarter then you were before.
However I've lately been looking back much more fondly of the year past, then of the one that I'm currently in. My whole college career has been filled with all sorts of experiences that I'll probably never forget, but the types of experiences from last year are very very different from those that I went through and am going through this year. The best way I can sum last year up is this: I used to be fun. I used to be a lotta fun to be around (or at least I'd like to think so), I used to be silly, off-the-wall crazy, and I loved it. This year however, for whatever reason, whenever I try and do that, I'm met with a "that's gay."
That's the best way to describe it I'd think, that anything that someone doesn't want you to do is gay. It doesn't quite make sense... and they say that you're not supposed to care what everyone else thinks, but I think that's BS. You can't possibly sustain the same high level of energy and happiness when everything around you feels like a buzzkill. Not that I'm trying to blame my surroundings, because I realize I'm probably partially at fault as well.
All I really wish is that this year was more fun. It's no secret that the guys at MSU this year are a lot cliquey-er, and as such it's a lot more difficult to actually have a good time with them. I don't know why exactly that is, why we've become so fragmented, but there're a lotta different reasons people attribute the cracks in the brotherhood too. The fact that we don't have a central location, the fact that people are busier (which I think is just an excuse, if you actually even wanted to do something you're able to make time), the stuff that happened towards the end of the year last year, whatever it is, I don't think I've genuinely laughed at something in a very long time.
To say that it sucks would be an understatement. It flat out hurts that (as I've said before) people are so apathetic about it, and prefer to remain in their little three-four man cliques. Sure I can spend time with them, and I do, but the fact remains: I used to be fun. We used to be fun. What happened? I just want to laugh and have fun like I did last year, and it just doesn't happen any more. Everything is so forced, nothing is natural any more.
Uh oh, another depressing sounding post huh? At least as people will tell you, the girls are seemingly a lot better this year then they were last year. They're a lot closer, which is good, I'm happy for them, I wish the guys could look at them and realize how genuinely happy they are just being kids, because thats all I really want right now.
However I've lately been looking back much more fondly of the year past, then of the one that I'm currently in. My whole college career has been filled with all sorts of experiences that I'll probably never forget, but the types of experiences from last year are very very different from those that I went through and am going through this year. The best way I can sum last year up is this: I used to be fun. I used to be a lotta fun to be around (or at least I'd like to think so), I used to be silly, off-the-wall crazy, and I loved it. This year however, for whatever reason, whenever I try and do that, I'm met with a "that's gay."
That's the best way to describe it I'd think, that anything that someone doesn't want you to do is gay. It doesn't quite make sense... and they say that you're not supposed to care what everyone else thinks, but I think that's BS. You can't possibly sustain the same high level of energy and happiness when everything around you feels like a buzzkill. Not that I'm trying to blame my surroundings, because I realize I'm probably partially at fault as well.
All I really wish is that this year was more fun. It's no secret that the guys at MSU this year are a lot cliquey-er, and as such it's a lot more difficult to actually have a good time with them. I don't know why exactly that is, why we've become so fragmented, but there're a lotta different reasons people attribute the cracks in the brotherhood too. The fact that we don't have a central location, the fact that people are busier (which I think is just an excuse, if you actually even wanted to do something you're able to make time), the stuff that happened towards the end of the year last year, whatever it is, I don't think I've genuinely laughed at something in a very long time.
To say that it sucks would be an understatement. It flat out hurts that (as I've said before) people are so apathetic about it, and prefer to remain in their little three-four man cliques. Sure I can spend time with them, and I do, but the fact remains: I used to be fun. We used to be fun. What happened? I just want to laugh and have fun like I did last year, and it just doesn't happen any more. Everything is so forced, nothing is natural any more.
Uh oh, another depressing sounding post huh? At least as people will tell you, the girls are seemingly a lot better this year then they were last year. They're a lot closer, which is good, I'm happy for them, I wish the guys could look at them and realize how genuinely happy they are just being kids, because thats all I really want right now.
posted by Tosif at
11:10 PM
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